Ten Items of Love and Hate
by BlueHarlequin
Summary: Ten random points that Jayne and Simon love and hate about each other. No particular time frame, pre and post-BDM. Jayne x Simon (censored version)
1. Jayne

Ten Items of Love and Hate

Chapter 1 – Jayne

Author: BlueHarlequin

Disclaimer: Nothing of Firefly belongs to me; this is not for profit. No copyright infringement intended.

Warnings: graphic sex between men, pwp, fluff

A/N: unbeta'd. Please be kind. Updates are always posted in my profile. Feel free to PM me with comments or leave a review, I love hearing from ya'll! Due to some of the site requirements there are some alternate avenues to access my writing posted in my profile as well. **All the uncensored content is on my blog or the other fiction site.**

Jayne x Simon

Summary: Ten random points that Jayne and Simon love and hate about each other. No particular time frame, pre and post-BDM. Mostly established Jayne x Simon

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One

Jayne loves it when Simon's clean. Not the clean from a shower, where he smells of soap and shampoo. No, Jayne loves it when Simon smells like himself. After Simon cleans the infirmary and scrubs all the blood and dirt from patching them up, all that's left is the slightly crisp smell of astringent and something purely Simon. When the young man drops down into their bunk and Jayne smells him, he can't help his hands as they pin the doctor to the wall. Jayne also can't help as his tongue swipes across the pale column of Simon's neck. The moan that issues from Simon's throat only inflames him further. Jayne leans forward, breathing in deeply the scent of his arousal. As the mercenary strips the doctor's clothes from his body he remembers that Simon tastes just as good as he smells.

Two

Jayne hates it when Simon's dirty. They're in a bar and some piece of _tā mā de_ is flirting with Simon. Jayne watches as the doctor brushes off the hand on his shoulder and grabs their drinks. The man says something that makes Simon blush and shake his head. Jayne almost leaps up from his chair when the guy grabs Simon's arm, his other hand grabbing at Simon's ass. Instead he bursts out laughing as Simon sends the man tumbling down to the floor with a clever sidestep and a kick to the back of his foot. Later that night, Jayne pulls Simon into the shower growling, "I need ta wash the dirt off ya." He takes special care running the sponge over his body, paying particular attention to his shoulder and his arm. As his hands glide over Simon's ass, fingers travelling down the cleft he whispers in his lover's ear, "Ain't nobody allowed to make ya dirty but me."

Three

Jayne loves it when Simon's eating fruit. After a rather successful job, that for once had no problems, the kitchen's stocked again with fresh food. This time the planet they're on is filled with orchards, and plums are the prime fruit of the season. The mercenary's lounging in one of the chairs at the dining table watching in half amusement half arousal as Simon eats. The slurping noise he makes as the juice of the fruit runs down his chin is almost obscene. Jayne thinks it's funny considering how Simon's supposed to have a fancy upbringing and all. It's a first, since most of the time the doctor cuts up his fruit and eats it. Simon's holding the half eaten plum in one hand, licking the sticky sweetness off his fingers one by one. Jayne's fully hard now as he stares at Simon swiping his tongue over each digit. A small groan escapes from the back of his throat as the doctor bites into the soft flesh with a wet squishing noise. Jayne's fascination with his moist juice stained lips is brought to an end as Simon cuts into his reverie with a sharply spoken, "What?" Jayne just shakes his head as he swings his feet off the chair beside him to sit upright. But Simon's already seen it, his eyes capture Jayne's with a smouldering look as he deliberately raises what's left of the plum to his mouth and sucks. Jayne smirks back, getting up and walking towards the door he mutters, "I'll be in my bunk." After a few moments spent savouring the lingering taste in his mouth, Simon smiles. Rising, he grabs a few more plums off the table and whispers to the empty room, "I'll be in Jayne's bunk."

Four

Jayne hates it when Simon rides him. It's not because he doesn't like it. No, it's wonderful in so many ways. It's because he swears Simon is trying to kill him. The kid has him tied to the bed and he's bouncing away like his life depends on it. The mercenary wonders where Simon learned to tie people up so well, since his arms and legs are totally immobile. He's learned not to try and get out of the bonds, the last time he tried Simon climbed off of him and went to make dinner. Fingers are snapped in front of his face. "Hey, where'd you go?" Jayne leers up at him, "Just thinkin' on good ya look up there."

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**Due to Fanfiction Admin this portion of the story has been censored for explicit content.**

**Full version available on the other links provided in my profile.**

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As Simon collapses on top of him, his last thought before he passes out is, _"He's definitely trying to kill me."_

Five

Jayne loves it when Simon's in doctor mode. Simon's sure of himself, commanding and totally in control. He stands outside the infirmary watching Simon's hands work quickly, extracting a bullet from Mal's shoulder. As the doctor presses gauze to the wound his eyes flick up, searching for Jayne, seeing him, and giving him a quick grin. After Mal's stabilized and he's patched up everyone else's scrapes and scratches, in the privacy of their bunk, Jayne lets him attend to him. Only here will Simon drop his façade. He struggles to calm his shaking hands as he stitches up a long knife wound in Jayne's arm. His face bleeds worry and concern and Jayne doesn't mind this either. The warm feeling of being needed settles in his chest as he pulls Simon close muttering, "It's okay, I'm still here."

Six

Jayne hates it when Simon has a hard time with River. She's been having more good days than bad, and even the bad days are starting to get fewer and farther between. But even though she is pretty much family sometimes Jayne just wants to strangle her. He knows that Simon still feels like there is something more he should be doing for her. He knows that sometimes he feels lost trying to figure out what's wrong. Simon's told him as much in so many words. Jayne's not a smart man but he's sharp enough to know when Simon just needs a break. He's clever enough to talk Kaylee into keeping her company as he bundles Simon into bed. And he's content just to lie there stoking Simon's hair as he drifts to sleep against his chest.

Seven

Jayne loves it when Simon's flustered. Wash has just told Simon that they can hear him down the hall. He's blushing uncontrollably and stammering to apologize. "We were sure Jayne was trying to kill you" says Wash with a mischievous grin, "cause you were screaming fit to be murdered." Simon ducks his head as he sees even Zoe smirk. Jayne never thought he would think of anyone as _adorable_ or _cute_ but at this moment it is the only way he can describe Simon. Wash continues on, "Or maybe Simon's starting a new religion," even Book looks up at this, his lips pursed, caught in between amusement and disapproval, "cause Simon calls out to 'God' enough someone might take notice." The doctor has his face in his hands now and all that Jayne can see is the pink tips of his ears. Surprisingly enough, it's Mal that takes pity on him. Sliding out of his chair he walks over and claps a hand down on Simon's shoulder. "Don't worry doc, you and him are about even with the amount he screams your name." Everyone turns to gape at Jayne, his face now bright red with embarrassment. The captain smiles as he strolls out of the room cause there's nothing as sweet as revenge on Jayne for all those sleepless nights.

Eight

Jayne hates it when Simon can't sleep. He knows that Simon doesn't want to worry him but it's always disturbing to wake up to an empty bed. Jayne also knows that sometimes Simon's mind can't shut down, that like his sister, there's too much information to process. Tonight he can't let it go; climbing out of his bunk he encounters Mal walking towards the bridge. The captain regards him silently then jerks his head toward the cargo bay. Jayne makes his way there and stops as he sees Simon pacing barefoot along the catwalk. The mercenary's eerily reminded of River as he watches him move around. A sudden idea grabs a hold of him and he stalks the doctor into a dark hallway. Pinning him to a wall, Jayne assaults him, his tongue stoking the soft palate of Simon's mouth, hands groping him savagely. Simon's tense at first, but relaxes in Jayne's arms as he figures out that he's not being attacked by some unknown assailant. One of Jayne's hands dips into Simon's sleep pants. He begins to roughly stoke him, but he pauses as the doctor grips his shoulders tightly. Jayne kisses him gently then murmurs softly against his ear, "Simon, let's go to bed."

Nine

Jayne loves it when Simon's jealous. He revels in the fact that he can push his buttons in that way. Jayne's favourite instance was over Vera. It had been couple of hectic weeks pulling a heist and they had all been too exhausted to engage in any hanky panky the entire time. Afterwards, Jayne had finally gotten time to clean his guns. It was something that was ingrained in his behaviour. He could never relax after a job until he had cleaned his guns. Simon was watching him intently from the bed as his hands ran up and down the length of the rifle, polishing Vera to a high shine. Jayne could feel the jealously radiating out of the burning gaze. He smirked as he could see it was not directed not at him but the gun in his hands. "Do you have to do that now?" he mutters petulantly. "We're finally able to rest and you want to spend all night cleaning your guns." The mercenary wants to laugh as he watches Simon irritably flip over on the bed with his back to him. He's been finished for over twenty minutes but he wants to toy with the younger man just a little bit more. "Feeling frustrated are ya?" Simon grumbles, saying something unintelligible. "What was that? I didn't quite hear ya? Jayne teases him. The doctor sits up and begins peeling off his night shirt. Jayne's mouth drops open as he watches Simon's hand dive into his sleep pants, "Yes! And if you don't get over here and do something about it then I will!" Jayne had to later apologize to Vera for dropping her on the floor.

Ten

Jayne hates it when Simon's mad at Mal. It's almost like hero worship and he doesn't like it, doesn't like it one bit. Mal's totally oblivious to it and that suits Jayne just fine. Because as much as he'd like to ignore it, he knows that Mal's taken a few _long_ looks at Simon every now and then. And at that moment Jayne recalls a moment that made his blood boil. _He's about to step in the infirmary but stops as he hears Simon yelling at the captain for getting them in yet another situation. Peeking around the corner he sees Mal leaning against a counter as Simon's peeling off a bloodstained shirt. The young doctor misses the appraising look and when he turns to retrieve a shirt in a bottom drawer Mal's eyes flick downward ogling the doc's tightly clad backside._ Not something he wanted to remember as he's getting angrier at the moment listening to Simon rant _'Mal doesn't listen to this'_ or _'Mal doesn't understand that'_ as doc paces back and forth in their bunk. "Jayne, are you even listening to me?" He's about to reach his breaking point and it doesn't help when the doctor frowns and says, "What? Do you think Mal's right?" Jayne glares at him and he sees Simon take a step back. Without warning Jayne grabs Simon around the waist and pulls him down on the bunk. Sliding his body over him Jayne whispers hotly in his ear, "I don't give a gorramn cent what Mal thinks. Now stop thinkin' on him. I don't want any other man makin' ya hot but me."

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tbc

Reviews are much appreciated


	2. Simon

Ten Items of Love and Hate

Chapter 2 – Simon

Author: BlueHarlequin

Disclaimer: Nothing of Firefly belongs to me; this is not for profit. No copyright infringement intended.

Warnings: graphic sex between men, pwp, fluff

A/N: unbeta'd. Please be kind. Updates are always posted in my profile. Feel free to PM me with comments or leave a review, I love hearing from ya'll! Due to some of the site requirements there are some alternate avenues to access my writing posted in my profile as well. **All the uncensored content is on my blog or the other fiction site.**

Jayne x Simon

Summary: Ten random points that Jayne and Simon love and hate about each other. No particular time frame, pre and post-BDM. Mostly established Jayne x Simon

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One

Simon loves it when Jayne is aggressive. The erotic thrill he gets when Jayne presses him against the wall and takes him is like nothing else he's ever felt. It's always with little warning, maybe a flash of lust in the eyes, or a barely perceptible tightening of his jaw and Simon's breath catches in his throat as he realises what's about to happen. The mercenary always manages to trap him alone or in a dark corner. They haven't been caught yet, but the threat of discovery only heightens his arousal. By the time Jayne has him pinned against whatever horizontal or vertical surface is nearby the doctor's already painfully hard. Jayne grinds his body against his causing Simon to gasp as their erections rub together. "Ya like this, don't ya? Me takin' ya where and when I want?" The young doctor can only whimper in response as Jayne roughly pulls down his trousers, his shoes clattering to the floor.

* * *

**Due to Fanfiction Admin this portion of the story has been censored for explicit content.**

**Full version available on the other links provided in my profile.**

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After all is said and done, Jayne helps him back into his clothes, straightening them both up as best he can. Simon can only stand dazed against the wall as the mercenary tenderly kisses him and walks away.

Two

Simon hates it when they're near Reaver space. The first time Reavers flew past when Simon had started bunking with Jayne he was both awed and horrified. Simon had been lying on the bed reading, listening to the sound of steel rasping against stone as Jayne sharpened his knives. Mal's voice floated over the intercom. Jayne stood, picking up Vera as he walked across the room and pulled open the curtain aside their bed. He remembers Jayne standing above him, eyes looking him over in an almost terrifying way. Jayne's favourite gun is placed on the bed before him and he waits for an explanation. "Move," is all Jayne says and Simon stands up only to be hauled down again into Jayne's arms. The mercenary rested his back against the wall and Simon felt the rise and fall of Jayne's chest against his back. He has only had a brief moment of panic as he feels Jayne's knife come up to rest against his throat. "Don't worry if it happens, I'll make it quick," is breathed lightly into his ear and Simon is _pissed_. He jabs his elbow back into the mercenary's side and grabs one of the guns off the rack. Turning in Jayne's lap to face him he sees a look of admiration flash across the mercenary's face. "No, we'll both go down fighting." They barely hear Mal's voice giving the all clear as Jayne pushes Simon down and starts tearing off his clothes.

Three

Simon loves it when Jayne cleans his guns. At first he hated it, the way Jayne would handle them would make him seethe with anger and jealousy. The first time he realised he was having resentful feelings towards the mercenary's guns he was appalled. For several weeks after that he had voluntarily taken clean up duty after dinner just to avoid being in their bunk. Somehow, Jayne seemed to guess that he was avoiding him, and Simon was faced with the unfortunate circumstance of cleaning with Jayne one night when he miraculously volunteered to help. Not only did it mean that they got done twice as fast but it mean that he no longer had an excuse not to join him in their bunk after dinner. The mercenary shoved him down on their bed once they got inside. Jayne divested him of all his clothes and tied him to the bed. "Jayne?" he asked breathlessly. The older man placed his chair next to the bed and began stripping down Vera. "Now Simon, I want ya ta watch everything I do, watch my hands real close now ya hear." By the time he was finished polishing the gun, Simon was begging for release. After about a month, Janye learned that if he really needed to clean his guns, he had to wait until Simon wasn't around.

Four

Simon hates it when Jayne is stubborn. "No! I am not having sex with you in the mess or the cockpit or Mal's room!" he hissed at his lover. It was bad enough that the cargo bay saw as much action as it did. The man was like a dog with a bone, and frankly it was getting harder to come up with counterpoints for his arguments. He conceded that the mess was usually empty at certain times of the day and that River would vacate the cockpit if asked. But Mal's room was a 'NO' and Simon could tell that one was the one he wanted the most, for what reason, he didn't want to think too deeply. One day while they were planetside, River waltzed into the living area where Simon and Jayne were playing Tall card. "S-i-m-o-n," She drawled his name. "Mal told me he's going out with Zoe to see a client and it's going to take a while. Everyone else is off ship too." She glided over to him and said in a conspiratorially loud whisper, "The code is 0443." She skipped away with an evil grin on her face. Before the young doctor could even get away, Jayne pounced on him and threw him over his shoulder. Days later, Mal casually handed Simon a pair of silk boxers as he told Jayne he was on tank duty for a month.

Five

Simon loves it when Jayne's self conscious. "Hey handsome." Simon chirps as Jayne walks into the dining area. He watches as his lover's face turns bright red. Kaylee giggles and Inara smirks. Mal laughs, "That is not the word I'd use to describe him." Simon looks offended for a moment, then his lips curl into an evil grin. "Really? I don't know. He's good all the qualities that make him handsome to me. He's strong, has an excellent physique and is great in bed. What more could you want?" Wash spews his tea across the table but Mal refuses to rise to the bait. "I'd a thought you would be all about having a partner with a brain like yours," he replied. Simon regarded the captain for a moment, "Mal, I doubt you would have kept Jayne on as a member of this crew if he wasn't smart." The doctor got up and walked toward the sleeping quarters, an unmistakable sway in his hips. Glancing over his shoulder he said, "Well he's certainly smart enough if he caught me." Mal flushed darkly as Inara laughed at him and Simon grins as he sees the hot promise of payback in Jayne's eyes.

Six

Simon hates it when Jayne's uncertain. Mal's pissed because he's found them for the first time tangled up together in Jayne's bunk. "_Tiān xiăodé_! This better not be what I think it is!" After months of arguing and sniping at each other Simon took a chance and attacked Jayne mid tirade. Jayne froze as soon as the doctor's mouth made contact with his. The next moment Simon was shoved against the wall and Jayne was kissing him so hard he saw stars. During the next few weeks, the kisses became hotter and longer and hands started to roam. Then finally, as he was lifting weights, he saw Simon looking at him, his eyes hooded and dark with lust. That first time Jayne had taken him against the wall in a dark corner of the cargo bay. Now they were both standing in same said cargo bay as Mal threatened to space Jayne for taking advantage of Simon. The young doctor felt a pain stab through his heart as Jayne looked at him, doubt clouding his eyes. Simon silences Mal's objections by grabbing Jayne's hand and announcing that he's have to space them both. It's as close of a declaration of love that Simon can make for now, but it's enough to convince the captain they're serious. As Mal walks away muttering, Simon looks up to see Jayne smiling at him in the most feral way. The wall in the dark corner of the cargo bay saw some more action that day.

Seven

Simon loves it when Jayne's jealous. He's been sitting at the bar for a good hour before the man across from him makes his move. The guy's been flirting with the young doctor for the past couple minutes and hasn't noticed the death glares Jayne has been shooting him from his place on the couch in the nearby lounge. Simon's playing a dangerous game, but then again, he's not too happy with the two whores sitting on either side of his lover, so he smiles easily at the guy coming toward him. The man sits down on the bar stool next to him, "Hi, I'm Monroe. What's a pretty thing like you doing here all alone?" Simon's gaze flicks briefly over to where Jayne is shifting uncomfortably on the couch. He grins and lets himself take a good look, flirting just a little bit in return. The man is tall like Jayne but his hair is dark and he has a neatly trimmed beard and moustache. "I'm not here alone," he replies loud enough for Jayne to hear, "but I am kind of lonely." Simon thinks the guy's figured it out when he motions toward the lounge, and says, "I'm sure a cute thing like you wouldn't have any problem in an establishment such as this." The girls on the couch laugh enticingly, not catching the innuendo in Monroe's words. The doctor winks at him and replies, "Indeed." The man smirks and leans in close, whispering, "Let me help you, and in a way you'll be helping me." His eyes dart quickly across the bar and back as he slides his hand slowly up the doctor's thigh. Simon waits for it. With an enraged snarl, Jayne storms over, the murderous look across his face not fazing the man at the bar one bit. Simon yelps as he's thrown over the mercenary's shoulder and carried away. The last thing he sees as they go out the door is a lithe dark haired man arguing furiously with Monroe.

Eight

Simon hates it when Jayne's out on a job. He hates it almost as much as when Mal drags River along with them. Simon wonders how he's become so attached to the man, and imagines that it almost borders on some kind of obsession. He thinks in astonishment how mere months ago it seemed like they couldn't stand each other. The unresolved sexual tension had been so thick that River had cryptically said to him one night, "You need to do something about him before we all drown in your stupidity." Now here he was, barely able to function at the thought of Jayne being in danger. Simon shook his head ruefully as he checked all the supplies in the infirmary for the fifth time. He groaned out loud as he realised how neurotic he was being. Recognizing that he wasn't going to get anything accomplished moping around, Simon went back to their bunk. Lying down on their bed he rolled over, breathing in Jayne's scent from his pillow. His hand travelled down his chest, dipping inside of his slacks and past his boxers.

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**Due to Fanfiction Admin this portion of the story has been censored for explicit content.**

**Full version available on the other links provided in my profile.**

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Simon lay there for a few minutes to catch his breath before cleaning himself up and walking back down to the infirmary. Then patiently and calmly, he waited.

Nine

Simon loves it when he's on top. The feelings are a bit too intense and it's over a bit too quickly. But it's SO worth it. It's one of the few times Jayne lets him take total control. He doesn't know what comes over him as the dirtiest things spill from his lips.

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**Due to Fanfiction Admin this portion of the story has been censored for explicit content.**

**Full version available on the other links provided in my profile.**

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Simon collapses on top of the man, pleased beyond measure that he's made the mercenary pass out yet again.

Ten

Simon hates it when River's right. "He fixed you." River says to him one night as he's working in the infirmary. "Who fixed me River? For that matter, I didn't realise I was broken." River glided over to him and punched a few buttons on the console shutting off the viewer. "_Mei mei_, I was working on that." River placed her hands on either side of his face and studied him intensely. "You were in pieces and he put them back together. He's good with his hands." She giggled. Simon felt his face growing warm as he thought about just how good Jayne was with his hands. He frowned at his sister. "River, you remember what I told you about people's private thoughts? It's not nice to pry." She made a face, "Silly, it's not private, everyone can see!" With that she danced out of the room just as Jayne walked up. "What was she goin' on about?" The doctor shook his head, "River was just telling me that I was broken and you fixed me." Jayne grabbed his hands and pulled him into an embrace. In a rare moment of perceptiveness he said, "Well ya were pretty broken up on account o' your sister," he pulled them closer and placed his hand on Simon's backside. The young doctor shivered as the mercenary's touch turned from comforting to stimulating, "but I'd like ta think you've gotten better since I've put my hands on ya." He smirked and Simon could only agree as he was lowered to the floor.

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Fin

Reviews are much appreciated


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